Dilbert's Laws of Work

• Don't be irreplaceable. If you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.
• You can go anywhere you want if you look serious and carry a clipboard.
• When the bosses talk about improving productivity, they are never talking about themselves.
• If at first you don't succeed, try again. Then quit. No use being a damn fool about it.
• Everything can be filed under "miscellaneous."
• If you are good, you will be assigned all the work.
• If you are really good, you will get out of it.
• At work, the authority of a person is inversely proportional to the number of pens that person is carrying.
• When you don't know what to do, walk fast and look worried.
• Following the rules will not get the job done.
• When confronted by a difficult problem, you can solve it more easily by reducing it to the question, "How would the Lone Ranger handle this?"
• The last person that quit or was fired will be held responsible for everything that goes wrong.

Posted 3:16 PM, Sunday, May 28, 2006, by Faber Optimé.
Post permanently located here.
Click here to email the author about this post.